Lessons for a father - The Ripple Effect

Image Courtesy: Flickr

Leadership does not emanate from someone that has something that a non-leader does not. My belief is everyone has leadership in them. Whether we choose to lead or not is not dependent on not having leadership. It is based on, usually, a very conscious choice.

Exuding positiveness or negativity, happiness or anger is also, usually, a deliberate affair. Saying out loud to ourselves, and following up on it, for example, that I will be happy today no matter what happens might set a day in motion that ends up being exactly that - happy.

If we choose to be angry, we will, ultimately and undoubtedly, find something that sets us off and turns possibly a good day into a bad one for us and for others.

So how do we lead everyone around us into a time of happiness? One way would be by being the pebble that causes The Ripple Effect.

The Ripple Effect

Think of a grand lake. What, possibly, could a small pebble do to a lake? If you are ever close to one, try throwing a small stone into the lake. You might see the ripples that you cause with that small stone and your conscious action of throwing it in the lake. 

What if we replicate the same behavior but in a human setting? In a still lake of humanity, in the form of people that surround us, what if we continuously throw pebbles of happiness and positive thoughts? What follows, with the spread of waves of goodness, is the ripple effect. It can even be looked as a "pay it forward" program at a much bigger level.

The same, unfortunately, holds true for negative behavior as well. Think of an executive that displays negative emotions to their managers who in turn pass it down. That behavior can also create The Ripple Effect, but of a kind that we do not want.

You want the world to change: Be the pebble in the lake of your professional and familial lives. Be the cause of happiness and of growth and betterment and bringing out the goodness in people. 

Be what causes the Ripple Effect.

Lessons for a father - Taking Care Of The Whole Organism

Image Courtesy: Wikimedia

We are all a part of a multi-cellular organism called the world. We are also the components of our familial and professional structure. From playing the part of individual cells and doing very specific functions to working with other "cells" towards the overall good of the entire system, we do it all.

In doing all this, we work in a system, I think, that resembles the human body in more ways than one.

The skeletal system can quite easily be the core values that hold us strong as beings. The skin and muscles are what we have to offer - our art, our interface to the world. The nervous system is all about what and how we communicate. 

Does that resemble anything to you? To me it looks like an organization where different components come together to make it work. The teams that might constitute the organization (a multi-cellular organism) act as cells that work towards the greater benefit of it. A family (again a multi-cellular organism) too comprises of components that continually work towards making the family happy and healthy.

So, where do we tend to falter? At the cartilage, tendon and ligament level I would think.

Metaphorically, at least for me, the "support staff" tends to get ignored. If our bones are healthy, and we are working on our muscular strength and communicating well why do we need to take care of anything else?

Let me ask, how should we feel about doing good to others? Or, helping out people in need or in distress? Or better still, leading in a world that craves, but seems to shy away from leadership? In the grand scheme of things, they might seem way less important, but go through a ligament tear or a ruptured tendon and you would suddenly realize that there is something more to it than just the basics.

For us to be great as a whole, IQ and EQ both are important. We as a complex system have multiple components working together too. We tend to not strengthen what we think is less important. A more holistic approach to growth seems necessary.

Let us, then, take care of the entire organism not just part of it. Things that are usually categorized as "soft skills" are not deemed important when compared to being a good engineer, architect, nurse or a doctor. 

The issue is this: for us to be a good "anything" the support staff, the cartilage, tendon and ligament (leadership, faith, kindness, empathy for example) of our lives should be celebrated as well.

Lessons for a father - And The Nobel Goes To...

Image Courtesy: @NobelPrize

The Nobel Peace Prize for this year was announced this week, and just like culture and history India and Pakistan now share a Nobel between them. The announcement is iconic in a lot of ways but very well deserved. Both the Nobel laureates continue to lead the world and act as shining lights in the lives of many in the world.

But, winning the Nobel doth not maketh a good leader, does it? So what is it in Kailash Satyarthi and Malala Yousafzay that makes people follow them? Courage. A lot of courage.

From the day Malala was shot by the Taliban to the first day that Kailash saved the first child from bonded labor, they have done little else but spread the word of peace, education and human rights. Both are ridding the world of vices that take childhood away from kids and throw them into a world that they are not ready for - that the children should not be facing. Both, Malala and Kailash, are heroes.

There is something else they do though. They lead. Even against all odds and no one giving them a chance of being successful, they lead from the front and make sure that girls get a chance to education (in the case of Malala Yousafzay) and that children do not spend their early years, full of innocence, in bonded labor or being exploited (in the case of Kailash Satyarthi). They fight stereotypes. They fight regimented efforts by their own people to do the worst you can do to another human - ignore them. They fight, though, with peace and love and forgiveness. And they fight not for themselves, but for others. Oh, wouldn't Mahatma Gandhi be proud?

Both the newly honored Nobel laureates also teach a very valuable lesson. Instead of accepting the status quo or giving up due to adversity, sometimes we need people to say, in the words of Kailash Satyarthi:

If not now, then when? If not you, then who?

Great words of a great human being. This week and forever, the world salutes and thanks these heroes of humanity.

Lessons for a father - Do You Like To Breathe?

Image Courtesy: Flickr

Seriously, do you like to breathe? And this is not a loaded scientific-environmental question. Just a simple, do you like breathing? If, like me, your answer is in the affirmative, then you must also realize how important breathing is for us. It is so important, in fact, that without it we would not survive for too long.

How much continuous and conscious thought do we, then, put in to something that our life depends on? I give it next to nothing. I do not think about breathing all day. I feel a need to breathe and, without any thought whatsoever, I breathe in response.

If, however, I were to think about it, breathing would require the following parts of our body to work:

• Diaphragm
• Chest cavity
• Lungs
• Intercostal muscles
• Rib cage
• Nose/ Mouth
• Windpipe
• Bronchial tubes
• Alveoli (air sacs)
• Capillaries (blood vessels)
• Hemoglobin
• Pulmonary artery

A very good definition of breathing is available at the National Heart, Lung and Blood Institute's website (link is here). All that work with so many components coming together and working to let us live and we hardly think about it?

But, if we wanted to learn, get better at our art, help others, lead, get fitter or stronger, respect everyone, provide inspiration by what we do, how we talk and how we live, we think about it endlessly.

We will not die if we do not lead by example or inspire others and get better. We might stagnate as people but we will continue to exist. The result can be a lot more catastrophic if we stopped breathing.

What if, on the other hand, we transformed our thought process to accept that being happy, continuous self improvement, respect and care for others is like breathing? Instead of endlessly thinking about it, what if, just like breathing, we just do whatever needs to be done? Somethings might not work that simply. A lot of them will.

We spend so much time in analyzing and thinking that, sometimes, we do not give the "doing" enough time. What is the worst thing that can happen if the entire plan with all the nuances is not in place? We would fail. We would have to adapt and make changes. We would have to come up with a different plan. Sure. But, by that time we would know exactly what would not work.

Breathe. In. Out. Now, go do what you have always needed to do. A lot of times that is all it takes.